But are numbers even real, or are they just part of our imagination? are all special numbers like pi and e just coincidences caused by the very nature of our universe. Or is math above that, and above everything else, controlling even the most chaotic universes with exactly the same beauty we see every day?
While thinking about these things, you enter an existential crisis and fall down the cliff. I find myself with your injured body in need for urgent medical attention, and the unoccupied hill in front of me. When i look at the horizon, i can already see thousands of people storming at the place to try and claim the hill. I could very easily help you, then come back and destroy them, but... is it worth giving them even the smallest moment of victory? After all, they are dedicating their lives entirely to occupying the hill, wich is futile since they are so, so weak. As i stand there, i wonder what would happen if they get the hill for even a second. But i don't need to wonder, i already know: They'll justify their only reason to live, they'll keep coming back with their pathetic attempts at claiming The Hill -as if they were kids, stupidly trying to become The Guy-. Is that really what they deserve? yes, they HAVE chosen that path, but... isn't it a little bit of our fault? are us, the one who started this hill thing, ruining hundreds of thousands of people's lifes? or would they have found another stupid thing to obsess over, had we never even existed?
So, the question remains, should i go and help aytoms, thus effectively making this remain a friendly competition, but also possibly affecting terribly the population's lives; or should i go to the hill, turning this competition into a war, but at the same time maybe -just maybe- doing a favour and helping this planet be as good as it was in it's golden age, when weapons weren't even needed because there were no wars?
I decide to go to the hill and leave you there, with several injuries that could be deadly if i don't help. As i'm leaving, i can see the words appear in front of me:
*aytoms will remember this*.
I decide to ignore the text and keep walking, justifying myself with the excuse that i just want to help, but my attempts are futile. Deep, deep down i know the real reason: i'm just selfish, i WANT to have the hill, i WANT to stand above everyone and feel their anger, their desire, their envy. But it's not just that: i want bloodshed. I know that by going to the hill i won't be helping anyone. I know they'll keep coming for more. And i know they'll get more aggresive over time. And i want that: I want a challenge. I want to be challenged, to make my enemies seriously belive they'll win. And just as they're reaching the peak of their happiness, i wanna take it all away, showing my real power. Men, women, kids, whatever challenges me, i will break their soul, I will make them be miserable, I will show them no mercy.
As i reach the hill and look at all the people coming, i remember: there's still a group of people, a group that's formed by few but that anyone can join, a group that can still defeat me with ease, with even the most stupid situations, with just a few memes, without even having to be coherent.
I'm reaching the very top, and i have a last tought: I can beat them. No matter what they throw at me, i'll come back. I won't care what they do, i'll defeat them, again and again. So what if i can't permanently win? so what if as high as my force might be i won't be able to do it? that just makes it better, it removes the unfairness, it evens things out. It turns this into an endurance test. And, at the end of the day, it remains a friendly thing. It's still just a game made up by some people and played by others. All that i said just came down to nothing. I could've just put a sentence or maybe two and still have claimed the hill. How many people are gonna read this anyways? not many, probably.
Still, as i finally claim the hill, i feel proud. I feel proud of what i made. I feel proud of writing a thing that will be seen by few, and read by even less. Even if i just changed subject all the time and ended up with a lame story (the guy fell, i climbed to the top), it was still worth it. In one way or the other, i still got the hill, i still got the victory, i still had fun.
my hill
